Yet again the Norwegians get the jump on it-had me fooled completely.

I figured with a name like "The Cumshots," had to be some backwoods hillbilly band's last act of defiance for all those years of Biblical ingestion.

I was wrong-I should've learned already from those other proud Oslo-based projects that couldn't have been for real-could they?

I can't understand a fucking word this guy is saying-kinda like the guy's buried beneath layers of dirt and the muffled screams of agony trying to get out-not that this holds any bearing on the guitar chords that come across like a wound up shot to the gut-gotta luv that old school riffing on their "Son Of Evil" namesake tune where for about a twenty second burst of pure drum noise you stop what you're doing and just stare.

The "six feet under" reference, literally and figuratively is none too far off either-you got elements of Stoner, Death, and Doom all under one cloudy canyon of chaos that pits Lemmy's charm with Sweden's Death cult exuberance and the outcome is never very pretty.

Definitely a step below your atypical Glam Rockin' Punk side show, and I mean way below; you're getting huge chunks of sonic density hurled straight at ya-"Dead Mans Hand," "No, Nothing, Please Die," "To Hell I Will Be Damned…"

You want more?

Buy the album. And start slowly; this isn't the kinda stuff that creeps up on you all subtle like, you get bitten in the ass before you've had the chance to set yourself properly.

The recording is abominably distorted, conveniently hiding the singer's inexcusable "voice" yet it does wonders for the rhythm section that at their gentlest sound like a diesel tank bearing down on your helpless Camry!

As evil, devious and downright disgusting as the name would indicate-and this is without advance lyrical knowledge or the remote possibility of deciphering a single word-The Cumshots are a hybrid of extreme and unruly sounds-check out the gurgling on "Halo Of
Horns," it gets better-that free thinking, pessimistic guttersluts will find delightfully disturbing if at the cost of a few suddenly blown speakers.

Released by This Dark Reign Records

Review by Vinnie Apicella [va85@columbia.edu]
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Vinnie Apicella

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